Tightrope

I feel like I've always been walking on this tightrope,
tiptoeing across a wire
drawn taut through thick air,
constantly shifting,
tipping this way and that.

I'm so afraid of falling,
that I barely even move.
For weeks, sometimes,
I'll freeze, only allowing my chest to rise and fall by inches,
terrified to try
and fail.

I only bring my feet up
just enough to not catch the rope wrong
and go tumbling into the space below me.

I don't know what's down there,
or long it would take
my bones to shatter against it.

Or if there's anything at all.
Because it could be
just nothingness after all.
A void just waiting to swallow me whole,
and trap me in darkness.

The tightrope sways gently beneath me,
my arms outstretched,
above the unknown.
I've always been afraid to fail.
Afraid to fall.
maybe it's time for me,
​to run.