Don't Mess With Peoples' Hats

Here's a tip for you:
Don't mess with peoples' hats.

You might be thinking,
it's just a prank
what harm could it possibly do?
But oh ho ho, that question's a can of worms right there!
One you just smashed open!

I'll tell you what it could do.

Well, it could always make someone sad and/or start crying,
which would just make you an asshole.

But, it could also do something a little more... unexpected.
Like reveal that someone's actually a demon in disguise
and their horns were tucked under the hat the whole time,
which may lead to you being incinerated on the spot
or possibly the apocalypse.
Whatever comes first.
Or maybe they kept their baby dragon warm within the hat
and as soon as it's knocked over
the creature attacks and bites you in the face.

Either way, you should just leave peoples' hats alone
and respect their personal space.
​Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.